Like everything in the law, the problem begins with definitions. The Violence Against Women Act, passed during the first term of the Clinton administration, includes a definition of domestic violence that is so wide you could drive a Mack truck through it.
States picked up on the loophole, and now most states include within their definitions of abuse, actions like making your partner “annoyed” or “distressed.”
The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) likewise followed suit. The CDC’s Uniform Definitions and Recommended Data Elements declares that partner violence includes “getting annoyed if the victim disagrees,” “withholding information from the victim,” and even “disregarding what the victim wants.”
In her book, Violent Partners: A Breakthrough Plan for Ending the Cycle of Abuse,
Lawyer Linda Mills makes the point that domestic violence is a complex story in which both partners often participate in the dynamic of abuse. She also mentioned that more than 800,000 men are assaulted by their intimate partners every year. I bet it's more than that. Why call 911 when attorneys give advice like this (click on report):“Don’t call 911 unless you are bleeding and she still has a weapon in her hand. Too many men who have called 911 for help have ended up being arrested for DV.”13
—Family law attorney Lisa Scott
Civil rights groups are starting to file law suits on men's behalf. If you are the victim of an unfair domestic violence charge, contact one of these groups and do the same. When the cost of stripping men of their Constitutional rights starts to cost something, it will change.
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